Angela Bolen, MA, LMFT
As a family systems therapist with an interest in couples reconciliation therapy and relational trauma from infidelity, I am passionate about walking beside you to work through the pain and confusion of your life situation. Intimate betrayal is one of the most devastating and disorienting events that can happen to an unsuspecting partner. The betrayed partner is left questioning fundamental beliefs and wrestling with the very existence of truth, love and relationship history. As a betrayed partner, you may be struggling to put together the jigsaw puzzle of your spouse’s betrayal story. Ruminating on small details and seemingly benign events that now cause you to question what was authentic and what was not.
The first stage of pain is involuntary and a result of something happening to you. The second is where you start to be able to exercise personal choice. This is where I can help.
Partners of infidelity often experience symptoms of posttraumatic stress. Recurrent and intrusive negative thoughts, prolonged psychological distress, nightmares, feelings of detachment, an inability to experience happiness and hypervigilance. In addition to these daunting issues and your own confusing thoughts and emotions, the solicited and unsolicited advice received by well-intentioned friends and family can leave the betrayed spouse feeling even more confused and ambivalent.
Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a structured modality I use to help clients deal with the anger, powerlessness, and intrusive reoccurring thoughts that are by-products of trauma. I also incorporate the Multidimensional Partner Trauma Model from the Association of Partners of Sex Addiction Trauma Specialists (APSATS) into my work with hurting partners. I give my clients’ real life tools to help with the anxiety, depression, and fatigue that come with healing from trauma. Once a betrayed partner begins to move though the trauma, I will offer suggestions to incorporate mindfulness, which often helps to center us in the present and can give clarity and create space to move forward. As a trauma informed therapist, I will never blame you for your partners acting out behavior.
Healing from intimate betrayal is a process and not for the faint of heart. It takes time and commitment. However, it is absolutely possible, and regardless of your future decisions, it is necessary for a whole and healthy you.
My work with couples promotes a deep healing experience where you can openly discuss your pain and be heard by your partner. I help to create an environment where being vulnerable becomes emotionally safe again and is used to foster closeness. Together, we will uncover patterns that your relationship gets caught in that blocks understanding and empathy, an essential component for healing relational trauma. I strive to help you and your partner connect in deeper ways than you may have ever thought possible for your relationship. Our work and the skills you learn will extend beyond the therapy room into day to day life and help you thrive as a couple.
I am a licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT) and trained in the Gottman Method for Couples Therapy, including additional training working with couples going through addiction recovery. I have extensive training with trauma, and received a Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Certificate (TF-CBT) from Harborview Center for Sexual Assault and Traumatic Stress. I have also been trained in the APSATS trauma model for helping Partners of Sex Addicts heal. My therapeutic experience includes working with individuals and families with anxiety, depression, and relationship discord. In addition, I have experience working with domestic violence survivors. I also enjoy working with children and teens who have been affected by their parent’s marital situation.
I am happy to speak with you to see if I am the right fit to accompany you on this path of self-discovery and healing. Please feel free to contact me to learn more.
Master of Arts in Marriage and Family Therapy (MA)
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT)
Certified Clinical Partner Specialist Candidate (CCPS-C)
Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Certificate (TF-CBT) from Harborview Center for Sexual Assault and Traumatic Stress
Parent Child Interactive Therapy Certificate (PCIT)
Completed Level 1 and Level 2 Training in Gottman Method Couples Work
Completed Level 3 Practicum Training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy